why me? rebulished
by Roseanddimtrifoever
Summary: Rose is in prison for the murder of the queen what no one knows is she is pregnant with a mini comrade. They prison break is still there, but the big question is what will Dimitri do when he finds out the truth?
1. Chapter 1

Why me?

A/N- the first two chapters are going to be the set up so it'll mostly be flashbacks.

Summary- Rose is in prison for the murder of the queen what no one knows is she is pregnant with a mini comrade. They prison break is still there, but the big question is what will Dimitri do when he finds out the truth?

A/N- So this chapter may be pretty long so sorry but I tried uploading this before but it wouldn't take my second chapter so I put it in the first to sorry to people who have already read this part.

Chapter 1- set up

"Ugh I hate this" I say as I take my head out of the toilet. How did I end up here sitting on the cold cement floor in one of the courts jail cell. Oh that's right I was arrested for killing the Queen Tatiana. God and lets not forget the fact that Dimitri through himself in front of me to protect me from the guardians. Oh I don't even want to get started on him he so confusing that man but all that does reminds of the last time he had me this confused.

~~~~~~~~Flashback~~~~~~~~~

Dimitri just told me his love had fade then abruptly got up and left. I sit there shocked for a moment then get up and snarl

"Oh no you don't" I get out of the church and look around to see him power walking to the direction of the woods.

Once I am away from the crowd around the back of the stores and Dimitri is close to the woods I start yelling at him "Dimitri get your ass over so we can talk!" he keeps going like I never spoke, now we are both in the woods.

I scream at him " Dimitri stop your ass right now! Stop acting like a ten year old and fucken talk to me!" that seems to get his attention because he stops abruptly and turns to look at me with a snarl on his face.

" I am the really cause I am not the one chasing someone who doesn't seem to want to talk to me" he yells

Oh he did not just go there that little ass I give him the meanest glare I can, which actually seems to work be cause I see him flinch.

"Don't give me that Dimitri you no we need to talk about this and just tying to get rid of me isn't going to solve your problem." I see the guilty look on his face proving my thought right

"really you though I would fall for that comrade?" I ask in a softer, quieter voice.

He looks up at that , "Fine I'll talk to you but can we please do it somewhere more private then woods." he says in a almost exasperated tone. But all I can think about is the fact that he said he would talk to me.

"okay why don't we go to your room so they don't start to worry." I tell him, all he does is give me a slight nod and heads to and starts walking to his room. We walk their in silence once we get to the door he opens it letting me in

Once we are in his room I take a look at his room. It'd quite small He had a kittle table a kitchenet and then leads to the bed with two door across it that o am guessing is the closet and the bathroom. I sat down at the little table which is directly across from the kitchen were Dimitri is leaning against the counter we sit there looking around well I am Dimitri seems to be more interested in the pattern in the floor  
I go to open my moth to say something when Dimitri finally talks

"Rose I won't lie to you I didn't mean what I said earlier but we still can't be together" at first all I can think is how happy I am he admits he was lying then it sinks in I realized everything he just said

"wait why not?"

I was so confused he tells me he didn't mean what he said, but yet we can't be together still why not?

" Because I still can't forgive myself fir what I did to you in Russia" his face was soft but sad as if he was reliving the events.

"Why not I have forgiven you I want to move past it!" I all but yelled why couldn't he understand it?

"How can you forgive me after I put you through all that pain!" He looked mad now he was starting to go to that place the dark of his past.

"Because I know that wasn't you back then. I know you wouldn't do that now"

"How do you know that? How can you be so sure? " he was yelling now started to remember why I called him a God.

"Because if you were a monster like you keep thinking are you wouldn't feel this remorse like you are now" I yelled back. He just kept quite looking at the ground.

"Dimtri look at me please " He kept quite still not looking or saying a thing.

"Dimtri I love you please just talk to me I need you " what he did next took me by surprise. He walked so fast that I all most didn't see him and grab my face in his hand roughly and kissed me with so much passion it made me dizzy. Dimtri soon pulled away but kept his forehead to mine breathing hard like me.

I looked into his eyes and saw the same lust and love I was feeling. So I graded his face in my hand and kissed him with all I had. With all the anger and grief I had felt. With all the love and passion I feel now and he did the same. That night i had sex for the second time in my life. As I lay there in his arm spooning next to his naked body staring at the wall across from me. I think about us about all we had been through all I want to come after this. Fearing he would wake up and try to deny are feelings again telling me it was wrong. So I get up quietly and start looking for me clothes. I soon hear Dimtri getting up from bed and walk up to me from behind and grab my waist.

"What are you doing? "

"Getting dressed" I say in a oblivious tone.

"Why, why don't you come back and lay with me " that's when I have had enough and I turn around so quick he doesn't have time to register it.

"Because I am tried of this game we are playing of this back and forth. I am afraid your just going to turn away from me because you still don't forgive yourself. I don't want that I just want you and you wont let me have that!" By the end if my speech I am yelling and out if breath.

"I wouldn't do that to you not after tonight I couldn't do that to you" His voice is soft and quite and he is looking me straight in the eye almost like he's looking into my soul.

"Fine then I have one question for you then... Do you forgive yourself?" I look him died in the eye not wanting to hear the answering fearing what I know he is going to say. He looks at me with a hesitant face then reply's the answer I feared most "no..." I let out a breath I didn't know I was holding.

"You see that's why I can't be with you not until you forgive yourself I have already forgave you know its your turn." I say with a determined yet sad voice. he looks at me pained and sad.

"Will you stay with him until then?" I know who he's talking about but decide to play dumb.

"Stay with who? " I ask

"Oh I don't know your boyfriend Adrian" he sound angry and all I do is let out a deep sigh.

"No I will not stay with him " I say I see the hope in his face and suppressed my smile.

"But that doesn't mean I will be with you either " I see his smile slightly falter when i say that. I turn around and start getting dressed. Once I start pulling my shoes I realized that Dimtri still hadn't moved yet.

"Are you going to stand there all day or are you going to say something" I say in my smart-ass tone.

"So your going to brake up with him? " I hear that hope in his voice again and can't hide my smile this time.

"Yes I am going to brake up with him."

"When? " he ask in a curious tone.

"Sometime in the next day on or so" my voice gets quieter, sadder almost. I am going to have to brake the heart of one of my closes, best friend ever. Oh shit this is going to be hard. Dimtri walks up to me and rubs my shoulder.

"It'll be okay we can do this" he says in a determined voice.

"What's this we your talking about there is no we not till you forgive yourself I do have conditions here." I say in a very serious tone. I see Dimtri's nervousness when I say that but he shakes his head as a way to tell me to keep going.

"Well first of this.." I say pointinng from me to him then to the bed "Can't happen again. Second we won't speak again till you decide because I don't want you making rash decisions because of me," I say I see he is about to argue so I put me hand up as a sign for him to shut it. " Thirdly when you think its time to talk again you text me and well meet at that little cafe okay? " I ask in a hard and serious tone. All he does is shake his head. Then he decides to say something.

" Fine I agree to your terms but you have to agree to mine too." I was about to say something when he cuts me off and continues talking.

"You need to break up with Adrian with in the week, and you can't be with anyone else they way you were with me tonight." I want to argue but then he speaks again,

"please just this one thing for me that's all I ask." He says in a pleading voice, and I just can't refuse.

"fine I agree to your terms"I say and I with that i leave abruptly But before I can go he grabs my arm, turns me around and gives me one of the most passionate kisses I have ever had.

"I love you Rose remember that" he's dead serious now and it makes me lose my control I kiss him again.

" good ilove you too but don't do that or I might stay and I don't know how much control I have left." I say it with a big smile on my face.

"Oh Roza I could make you lose control in seconds." and with that I push him back inside for round two.

While pushing him back to the bed I say " this will be the last time in a very very long time"

I am on my way back to my room when I run into the person I want see least right now...

"Hey little dhampir, whats happen" All could do was look in shock why did he have to show up now of all times? I know I said the next time I see him I would tell him but I hadn't tought I would see him for day. At least thats what I was hoping.

No. I promised Dimitri I have to keep that promise to him. Plus I owe it to Adrian to tell him the truth he is my friend and I love him I don't want to see him hurt but this would be best in the long run. I was just about to say something when Adrian beat me to it.

" You okay little dhampir?"

I realized then I hadn't talked in a while he probably had been calling my name. "Well I wouldn't say I was doing bad exactly...but Adrian"

"Wow have never seen your aura so bright before I don't know what to me so long to see it but it is glowing like the sun, I mean there is still a ring of black on it but its so miniscule compared to the brightness... theres also something else but its hard to see under all that yellow..." he had started rambling so I knew I had to cut in.

" Adrian we need to talk" I had said it with some sharpness I hadn't meant to be there but it seem to get him out of his trance.

I started walking toward a bench in the garden it was quite pretty with scrolly iron work. I sat down I could sense Adrian had sat done and I could see his feet, because I had kept my head down the whole time looking at my hands with great interest.

" What is it Rose?" Oh god he said my name he could tell there was something going on.

" Well..." I didn't know how to say this maybe I should just be strait forward, but at the same time I want to put him down gently..

"Its him isn't it" it wasn't really a question but I felt I had to answer.

"Yes it is him.. but you have to understand Adrian I do love you.. its just I don't love you the same way I love Dimitri with him its like I can't breath without him like I am half the person i could be without him...do you understand what I am to say?" I finally looked up at him and I saw in his eyes hurt, understanding, and sadness.

" I understand but you have to understand this still hurts so I would like to be friends but it will take some time do you understand?" the sadness in his voice and face almost broke my heart but knew I had to do this for both him and for me.

"Yes of course I understand I just hope we could return to being friends in the future."

"So do I Rose so do I" and with that he got up and left.

It had been a couple of weeks sense then I hadn't seen or heard from Adrian in awhile. I had seen Dimitri and though it was hard I kept to my promise I didn't talk to him though I did wave and smile to him.

I also told Liss what was going on she had been kept in the dark for to long before I didn't want to do the same now. She was happy for us and agreed with the whole letting him forgive himself first thing.

Today was Wednesday and I had been having a wonderful dream about a certain Russian on the beach... naked.;) When I jolted awake by the sudden feeling to through up not the kind that involves stigori. No the normal kind I ran to my bathroom and started throwing up . That's when I felt hands hold my hair back I jumped but didn't do anything because I was to busy heaving over the toilet. When I finally stopped and turned around there stood my father with his normal outfit a suite with bright blue scarf and handkerchief. It looked very well on him with is dark skin tone and dark hair.

"Ki are you okay?" he looked so worried I ahd never seen that look on him before but it reminded me he was my dad and he really did care.

" I am better know thanks old man.. but what are you doing hear?" he gave me an exasperated look, and thats when it hit me we were suppose to have a bonding day today.

"well I cam to hangout with my daughter today but it looks like I will be having to take her to the clinic instead." he gave me a amused look which I did not return.

" NO, I am fine now' when really my stomach was still turnning.

" to bad its not common for dhampir's to get sick so this is the finale word your going" he gave me this look that told me not to mess with him. Not many people scared me and he was one one of those few.

" Now get dress and well leave." I listen to him and went to my room and changed into some skinny jeans and I blood red tank top with some gray convers.

"okay I am done old man" but I didn't know was that I would never be ready for what happened next.

A/N- so I want to keep going but I was starting to fall asleep please review see you soon guys

love,

Taryn ;)


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N hey everyone I hope this uploads been having some problem figuring out how to do that :)**

**Also I am thinking of writing another story on the sides so watch out for that I will also tell if I do in my A/N so look out :)**

**Last Time-**

**" Now get dress and well leave." I listen to him and went to my room and changed into some skinny jeans and I blood red tank top with some gray convers.**

**"okay I am done old man" but I didn't know was that I would never be ready for what happened next.**

**Present-**

As we were heading I had to ask Abe the question that had been bothering senses this morning.

"Abe...it kinda seemed like knew it wasn't common for me to get sick not just dhampir's in general..how could you know?" I knew my face was all scrunched trying to figure it out.

"That's easy kiz I've been keeping track of you your whole life the sent me reports every time you were sent to the clinic." he scuffled like it was the stupidest question he ever herd.

"Wow...i never thought you.. actually cared.." I saw his exspration so I quickly finished my sentence."back then now I can see you really did" I finished my sentence with a big smile, he was smiling back at me. We were almost to the clinic by now and my nervousness started to pick at me again. God damn I hate doctors.

I sat down in the whit plastic chairs in the crisp white waiting room as my dad talked to nurse at the front desk." Dock should be shown." he said with a soft, loved filled smile.

Sure enough not five minutes later we were called back to one f the many rooms.

"Hello Rose I am Taryn (me yay) I just have a few procedure questions then the doctor should be in soon after."

"Okay sounds good."

"All right so do you smoke?"

"No"

"Have you had any alcohol recently?"

"No"

"When was your last menstrual cycle?"

"Um well there not really consistent but I'd have to say between 4 to 6 weeks"

"Okay thank you now this may be awkward with your father hear but was was the last time you had sex?"

I tried my hardest not o blush but I could feel the heat rising in my cheeks," um... about two weeks now.." I could see my dad's eyebrow rise and give me a questioning look.

"Interesting... well I'll go talk to the doctor she should be inn soon." hum I wonder what she meant by interesting?

"Really rose do I have to go beat Adrian ass for sleeping my little girl?" he was starting to get mad but I had to set him straight for Adrian's own health.

"No dad it wasn't Adrian" I said in a small voice.

If possible is eyebrow rose higher, "Oh really so who was it?" he gave me this face that said he wouldn't stand for any shit I might try to say.

"Dimitri" I say in just below a whisper hoping he won't hear it. But luck didn'tseem to be on my side."WHAT?" He all but yells.

"You heard me Dimitri we made up but I am not going to be with him till he forgives himself." I say felling like I had to defend myself with the truth.

"What does that mean for Adrian?"

"Adrian and me are done I told him the truth right after it happened and he understood be we haven't really talked senses then." Abe was just about to say something when the doctor walked in. She was tall like most moriri with black hair with dark brow highlights, she had soft brown eyes with a ring of gold in them when hey hit the light. She looked pretty young for a doctor but who am I to judge.

"Hi Miss. Hathaway.. so I am going to go straight to the points I have a few ideas what could be wrong so we just need to take a few test and we can find out the answer in are labs here should it take all of 30 minute, sound good?" wow wasn't expecting that be I kinda liked it didn't waste anytime.

"Um.. sure what test will you be doing?"

"Oh the are really easy a simple urine sample and blood test will that be okay?"

"Sounds good..oh wait I didn't catch your name?"

"Oh sorry about that haha I am a little flustered with work but I am " She said with soft warm smile. "Well nice to meet you lets get to it"

We had been sitting in here for the past 20 minutes when the Doc finally came in. Her smile and eye's were even softer then last which could only mean thee news might not be welcomed. Oh god do I have cancer or something.

"Well Rose its exactly what I thought it was." she say now I am getting even scarder (is that a real word?).

"'What is it Doc don't beat around the bush please." She taakes a deep breath and says the most unexpected thin ever "Rose...your pregnant"


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N- Yay two in one day! This should be the end of the flashbacks :)**

**Last time-**

'What is it Doc don't beat around the bush please." She taakes a deep breath and says the most unexpected thin ever "Rose...your pregnant"

**Present-**

"Wh..what that can't be the only person I have ever slept with my whole life is dhampir how is that even possible..."

"Well Rose there is the factor of you being shadow kissed, but there maybe something with with who ever the father of the baby is..."

"Oh so you want to know...if I tell it can not leave this room id that possible.." I asked her with pleading eyes.

"oh of course it will stay in this room."

"okay...its.. Dimitri Belikov.."

"...oh... well actually that make some sense..." I looked up at her in surprise.

"How does that make any sense?" I questioned what surprised me most was when my father answered the question I had almost forgot he was there.

"If sense he was dhmapir to turn stigoiri he had to basically given moirri gene's so he could have fangs and a thrust for blood...and when he got turn back those gene's were still there, they don't just disappear."

"Exactly so those moirri gene's miked with your dhmapir gene's equals baby." says the sweet doctor, but I am still in a shock me and Dimitri have a baby and this baby is in meat this moment in time. I was starting to get dizzy with all the news, but I held it together I need to talk to Dimitri.

I started to get up but the doctor stopped me, "Rose you need these prenatal vitamins for the baby.."

"Oh thanks Doc" I said in a monotone voice. Abe started leading me out of the clinic when I got a text from Dimitri of all people.

**I am ready Roza meet me at the cafe in the next half an hour ~D ;)**

Are you kidding of all times he is ready god dammit but then again maybe this is for the best.

**Okay I'll be there in 5 I am by the clinic any ways ~ R**

"Who are texting kiz?"

"The father of my baby he is ready to forgive himself so I am going to talk to him." Abe looked shocked and was going to sa something when my phone beeped again.

**Why were you at the clinic are you okay ~ D :-/**

**That depends I'll tell you when I get there ~R :/**

"Are yousure kiz"

"its as good as a time as any " and with that I left to talk to him.

Once I got there I went straight for the food, ordering some hot chocolate and four chocolate donuts, when I was given my food I went to looking for my Russian god. I spotted him in the corner reading a western and sipping some hot coco. Slowly walked up to him, when I was 3 feet away his head snapped up and with he brought his beautiful smile I hadn't seen in along time. But when he spotted my worrisome smile his smile slowly fluatered and his eyebrow raised questioning me.

"Hey comrade" I tried to but my normal smart-ass rose into but I just couldn't find the energy.

"Roza what wrong my love?" his worry rang through his voice bringing a small smile onto my face.

"Can I sit so I can explain?" I said trying raise my eyebrow failing horribly causing him to chuckle, it was like a warm blanket around me.

"Of course Roza" wow someone is loving today. I pulled the chair out and put my things down. I sat down and just looked at him he had his hair tied back as usual, had on a white tight fitting shirt wanting me to touch his chiseled abs, but I held back, and he had on hiss usual, beautiful duster. I started eating my first donut when I finally looked up at is beautiful deep chocolate eyes. All I saw there was love, lust and curiosity.

"Roza love please tell me whats wrong."his voice was full of so much concern I almost broke.

Almost, " Aren't we suppose to be talking about you isn't that what this meeting about." I said with all seriousness.

"well yes but promise me well get to you."

"Promise...so you've forgiven yourself.."

"Yes I mean I sill have my demons I need to face but I am slowly understanding I had no control then.." That's what I had been waiting for I mean sure I understand he's not fully there yet but he understands he didn't have control over himself.

"That's what I've been waiting for comrade, I know your not fully healed but I want to help I want to be with you...your timing was perfect..."

"Perfect for what will you tell me what wrong now Roza." he was so worried how I am going to say this...

"Dimitri you know when you were strigoiri you had fangs.." he cringed when I said that but he still nodded his head.

"Well to do that sense you are dhampir they would... in a sense add moirri gene's into you...i am I explaining this right?" he was giving me a confused look but nodded. My hands hand started to shake with anticipation...how will he react to this. So I toke the cheaters way out and just handed Dimitri the prenatal vitamins.

When are hands touched I felt the usual shock and it sent me comforting feelings.

"what is this"

"read the label comrade.." he turned the bottle over and read the itle and reread the tittle.

"theses are prenatal vitamins...why do you have them?" he looked shocked and hurt I knew what he was thinking so I had to tell him wrong.

"WE are pregnant.." I emphasized on the we part. He looked up from the bottle eyes wide jaw open he looked at me then at my stomach then back to me again. The hurt that was on his face before turned to disbelief and happiness. The moment was ruined when the royal guard came up to us. I was about to yell at them to leave Dimitri alone they had already done enough when the first guy talked.

"Rosemaire Hathaway come with us your are under arrest for high treason." his voice and face was set in total blank.

"What am I being arrested for I have done anything unless you count yelling at the queen, which I don't"

"Roza calm down it won't help upsetting we need to talk this out." Dimitri's voice was so calm I had to believe him.

"Miss Hathaway I really don't want to do this the hard way and make a scene out of this just calm down." he had his hands up and was talking almost down to me like he was trying to tame a wild animal.

"No I want you to explain to me what is going on here then I may go with you." I said with determination I got up and out of the corner of my eye I saw Dimitri get up with me.

" guess we are doing this the hard way ." with that he tried to punch me on the side of my faced but I blocked him next he tried to swipe my feet out from under me I jumped over his feet and punched him on the left side of the face knocking him out. I moved on to the next guy Dimitri had taken two down already but was starting to get tried and they kept aiming for my stomach so I did my best to defend our baby.

By know me and Dimitri were back too back but we were greatly out numbered and I was dieing here you know being prego and all so finally I spoke up.

"Dimitri stop I am starting to get tried and hurting, thy keep aiming for my stomach we have to stop for the baby." I looked up gazing in his eyes i saw his determination bbut understanding in his eyes.

"Fine I'll go with you but please tell me what I am being accused of." I say it as calmly as I can

"Miss Hathaway you are under arrest for the murder of Queen Tatianna."

And thats how I end up in this small cell sitting on cold hard floor puking my guts out.

**A/N- hope you liked it and happy 4th of July All **

**Taryn :)**


	4. Chapter 4

**Sorry you guys my computer hasn't turned on since august it wouldn't charge but its been fixed now so what i am going to do, is edit the chapters i already have maybe get a beta then star uploading new ones so it should be by the end of the month when you'll get new stuff. once again sorry but thank you for all the love for my story it means a lot.**

**- Tayn**


End file.
